Coconut Water Companion
After a life changing event, people and places sometimes have a crippling affect on you. The Holidays they say are a most difficult time and you should prepare for them.
Prepare how you do or do not want to celebrate and where, what you will do when you need a break away, and how or if you will explain to others.
Many times others will not understand your need for things to be a certain way bc they need the opposite or don’t even consider that this will be difficult for you. You stress over it, come to terms with what will happen and prepare your energy to endure.
Soon I will share my journey through my birthday, Halloween, Jonathan’s birthday, Thanksgiving, Christmas and New Years — that’s exactly what it has been, a journey of mountains and valleys.
But there are always those unexpected places that have you almost break down in tears. Those places that you did not prepare all your strength for...
This time it was in the Target checkout line, somewhere that I hadn’t frequented much bc of the pandemic this last year but also hadn’t really avoided either.
Jonathan loved coconut water, he knew that I love coconut water.
As I saw the boxes of coconut water, I remembered how he would always work to convince me to buy it for him.
“Come on Mom, we can share it, it’s good for me, I know you love it, at least it’s not soda.“
He thought he was using his great negotiating skills and charm on me and I loved that little smile he would give as he tried to sell me on a box of coconut water for the 2 of us.
A little game of him convincing me to let him have what he wanted and him so proud of his accomplishment, but it really took no convincing me at all. (Don’t tell him that) 🙂
“Mom do you want another drink or can I finish it?” He would always ask, such a gentleman.
I stood there waiting in line, hiding behind my mask, I fought back the tears. Imagining that my little Buddy was next to me jumping around, holding his prized possession.
Alone with my thoughts, people all around but nobody seeing my pain.
Then it was my turn and I was forced back into reality.
Back to life without my jumping jellybean, coconut water companion. 💔
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