Becoming Normal Again

This picture was taken a few days before Jonathan’s passing. We did not know at the time but, Simpson party of 4, would be our new normal.

A lot of people are finding a new normal right now. It is almost comforting for everything to be not normal, because everything in my world was not normal after February 11th at 7am.

The balance of a family is definitely dependent on all its members, I notice it more now when 1 is missing, than when each was added at birth. Being only a girl mom has felt strange, because I know what it’s like to parent both. (good thing we have Charlie to add a little testosterone)

Carrying on with life as if nothing has changed is one of the hardest parts of losing someone. Going to work and trying to focus, interacting with people that may not know what has happened in your life, going to the grocery store and reaching out to grab an item but remembering that the person that loved that is no longer here, dishing dinner and stopping yourself from asking about that member of the family...

Even though I know that the world is a place of extreme uncertainty right now, self quarantining is difficult and I would never wish for this turmoil of sickness and death on anyone, for me it has been a blessing to have extra alone time to somehow become “normal” again.